We had an extremely busy, slightly fun, very informational, weekend. On friday, James worked the morning shift. After he got home, we had lunch and packed all the food and stuff to leave. On the way we picked up my ice cream cake. We made it to my moms around 2pm. From 2pm until the start of the party, we helped decorate, clean, prepare food, and move furniture. My party was pretty fun. It probably could have been better, but with last minute planning, that's what you get. Everyone who said they were coming, did come though, so it was really not that bad. Most of James' family came, and my mom and sisters and step dad and grandma were all there too. And I had one friend Amber show up too. My dad could not make it. Overall it was nice to just have fun and spend time with family. I got some great gifts too. Some dvds I wanted, some great clothes, a halloween scrapbook, and of course some gift cards and cash I still get to go spend.
Also friday night, as my party was ending, James' mom and I, finally told his aunt & uncle about his deployment. His aunt didn't take it too well. But luckily everyone wants to have a big going away party, so it's looking like that's gonna happen. Not sure when yet still, but we've got a couple days in mind. I've got to talk to his mom and figure it out for sure though. I think friday night was when it REALLY sunk in, that James was really leaving. He has less than a month left with me. It's so hard and depressing. I have made up my mind that this last month is going to be spent with lots of family. We will probably be going nonstop all the time to this store and this persons house and whatnot, but family is really important right now, so we're gonna make time for them all no matter what.
Now onto saturday. Saturday was very very busy. After we both got up, we had lunch, and then James worked on fixing a small problem with the car while I got dressed and ready. After we were both done, we went to the store to get a gift for his cousins birthday party. Then we came home, finished getting ready, then went to the birthday party. For once, it was actually really nice out, almost too chilly. I was so happy to not be sweating and hot though. At the very beginning of James' cousin's party, James' mom told his grandmother about the deployment. She definitely took it better than the rest of us did. We had to leave the party kind of early because we had a family army meeting thing to attend. We were about two hours late, but we went. We shook some hands, stood in the corner, and then came home. We were there for about an hour.
Sunday was a very long, but very helpful day. We got up early and had to be to James' unit around 9am for a Yellow Ribbon Event. We pretty much sat in an auditorium all day and had people talk to us about different things. In the morning, things that were discussed were the FRG, Tricare, and financial things. I am looking more into Tricare because if I'm understanding correctly, I will receive free health care while James is gone. The lady who gave the presentation did not do a very good job, because it was extremely confusing, so I'm gonna need to find someone to help me out with all this information and let me know how to go about getting in this program. For the finances, they mainly discussed what types of money each person would be making, and how to take care of the finances while the soldiers are gone and that sort of thing. Then we went to lunch at Golden Corral, which was free for the soldiers AND family. So that was nice. It had to be a quick lunch though. I also ran into some old friends from my old church I used to go to. It was so nice seeing them.
After lunch on sunday, was a little more interesting. We heard lectures on the Red Cross, Marriage Enrichment, Legal Information, Military One Source, Military Family Life, Personal Finances, and Safety Awareness. The Red Cross is going to be very helpful in some ways if I ever need James in an emergency. Also the meeting James' mom goes to at her church is sponsored by the Red Cross, which I'm going to try and attend with her sometime. I learned from the Legal briefing that I most likely should get a Power of Attorney for James. Especially with him leaving in less than a month, things like Tricare will probably not be completed by then. The best briefing I heard yesterday was about Military One Source. It seems that they have TONS of helpful things FREE to me. I am definitely going to check out that website, and order some free cds (informational cds) and check out everything they offer. They even offer free counseling and a free online library, including books to read, plus informational books on how to fix things. I think this is going to be my most used website while James is gone. The safety awareness briefing was helpful, but also got me worrying about some things. It was mainly about making sure our house is safe and I am safe while James is gone. We're discussing some options on how to keep me safe and make me FEEL safe while he's gone.
After leaving the unit, we had dinner with James' parents on the way home. And once we got home, we talked a lot about what we heard and what we learned and what needs done and so on. Then of course we went to bed and James is at work this morning. I have been going through paperwork we got along with cleaning the house. I should be getting my avon stuff today and will work on that later.
This deployment is coming faster and faster and I am not ready for it. I don't think I ever will be. It's getting harder and harder to not freak out and have a panic attack about it. I'm so scared. Actually terrified. Not only for myself being here alone, but also for James' safety of course. And our marriage. I know we can get through this. It's just gonna be hard. I get sick to my stomach just thinking about being away from him for so long. I honestly think I'm going to have to take advantage of the free counseling while he's gone. And possibly have like couple's counseling once he comes back. This is going to be the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life. All I can say, is that this last month is going to be full of family time, and love. That's all I can do, is show him how much I love him and will miss him.
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